Serendipitously

Sometimes, really nice surprises come out of nowhere. Moments that add new twists to my everyday life, even if they come and go quickly. Eventually, I start using different words, thoughts, and actions because of these unexpected things that happened.

The interesting and funny thing about this is how it completely changes my thoughts about "control". I used to think I should decide exactly what I want to be and how to do it. But if these random situations can't be controlled by me and still make a big difference in my life, it means I'm not the only one in charge of my possible pathways towards the "future me".

"Which is pretty obvious" a part of my thoughts says (even though it's hard for me to really understand and accept).

Perhaps there exists a profound and substantial significance in my choices though, influencing these serendipitous occurrences in "my favor" (or simply what I've chosen, which may not necessarily it's for my "best"). I really want to believe in that. As somehow the "field of possibilites" around my existence could "synchronously harmonize" with my intentions... 

Sometimes it feels like there's a gravitational pull drawing my attention, especially to certain things - regardless my intentions. Do others feel this too? Or is it just me being influenced by my own perspective without being able to perceive it? It's hard to figure out, since no one else can really know my thoughts, feel what I've gone through, or truly understand my unique experiences and the way I see the world. 

I guess I just have to keep... Trying to understand myself.